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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24578992">What Is and Is Not the Fault of Riley Matthews</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sachantquiladesailes_98/pseuds/sachantquiladesailes_98'>sachantquiladesailes_98</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Girl Meets World</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:01:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,224</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24578992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sachantquiladesailes_98/pseuds/sachantquiladesailes_98</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm still not over this stupid show honestly, and I have a lot of feelings about pretty much everything to do with it. I found this old story kicking around on my computer and decided to post it in case any of y'all need some help and closure when it comes to this show too. Say what you will about Riley- she's a disaster, but she has a good heart, and I think she would need to date Lucas to truly understand why it didn't work. Let me know what you think or if there's anyone else out there who still hasn't recovered from this show.</p>
    </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lucas Friar/Maya Hart, Riley Matthews/Farkle Minkus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>67</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>What Is and Is Not the Fault of Riley Matthews</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm still not over this stupid show honestly, and I have a lot of feelings about pretty much everything to do with it. I found this old story kicking around on my computer and decided to post it in case any of y'all need some help and closure when it comes to this show too. Say what you will about Riley- she's a disaster, but she has a good heart, and I think she would need to date Lucas to truly understand why it didn't work. Let me know what you think or if there's anyone else out there who still hasn't recovered from this show.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Maya maintains that it’s Riley’s fault.</p><p>I mean, was it her fault too? Well, yes probably, most things were. But if Riley didn’t have the face of an infant, puppy, and Mother fricken Teresa rolled into one, Maya would have been honest with her…. Maybe. She’s hard to say no to, okay? That’s the point!</p><p>And see, the thing is, Riley can act as innocent as she wants, but she <em>knew.</em> She had to have known. For one thing, Maya’s never really been able to fool Riley in the first place. Even back in the eighth grade, Lucas had “chosen” Riley and Maya had “never really liked him” and Riley had given her a sad, knowing gaze.</p><p><em>She’d dated him anyway</em>, Maya’s pesky thoughts always reminded her.</p><p>But for another thing, why else would Riley have asked her in the first place? Maya’s dated a lot of guys now, and never once has she felt the need to ask for Riley’s permission to do so. I mean, that’s not a great argument because Maya lives by the tried and true ‘ask forgiveness, not permission’ adage.</p><p>But <em>Riley </em>has also dated other people and she’s only asked for Maya’s blessing once. Only when she was 17 and ready to date for real and “I’ve just never been able to shake the feeling that something’s there, Peaches” and “you have to admit that Lucas hasn’t asked… anyone… out… yet…” Then, she’d trailed off, managing to somehow look both contrite and vindictive at the same time, her eyes sympathetic but holding the unsaid words in them: <em>“You have to admit that Lucas hasn’t asked <span class="u">you</span> out”.</em></p><p>So she must have known. She <em>must have</em>. Why else would she have asked?</p><p>But… she wasn’t wrong. He hadn’t asked Maya out. Honestly, he hadn’t even displayed the most cursory interest in asking Maya out. He barely even responded to her various ‘Huckleberrys’ and ‘Ranger Ricks’ and ‘Bucky McBoingboings’ anymore. He didn’t sass her or tease her or laugh with her or… anything. Of course, he was still perfectly polite and civil. Of course he was! A perfect little Southern gentleman, like his Mama raised him to be…</p><p>Somehow that was worse.</p><p>So Maya told Riley that it was fine. She laughed Riley’s concerns away and soothed and comforted until the puppy/infant/saint was content once more. She joked and bantered with Riley (and Farkle when he put in his weekly appearance at the bay window) and teased Mr. Matthews like normal all night. It was only as she was leaving for home and Riley was preparing to call Lucas (a tradition that had apparently been happening for weeks) that the pain suddenly hit her for just a second.</p><p>Only a second. Maya’s a veteran at this sort of stuff. But it was a second that Riley had caught with a sad, knowing gaze. She <em>knew</em>.</p><p>
  <em>She’d dated him anyway.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Farkle has concluded that it’s Riley’s fault.</p><p>At first, he thought that it was just natural teenage angst and the confusion that comes with being best friends with two beautiful and talented girls. He had been 14 when he realized that his feelings for Maya <em>were </em>just that. He had been 15 when he realized that he honest-to-God adored Riley Matthews.</p><p>And <em>then </em>he thought, it was still just a very natural thing. How could you not love this girl? She was the most wonderful thing he had ever laid eyes on… and Farkle has a high definition telescope on his roof.</p><p>How could anyone not love this girl?</p><p>(He reminded himself of this when she caught his hand, eyes shining and words tripping over themselves in her excitement to tell him that Lucas wants her to be his actual girlfriend. How could anyone not love this girl? How could <em>Lucas </em>not love this girl?)</p><p>And it was okay, because their relationship was a flop. Lucas and Maya had… something… going on. Normally, Farkle would have theorized, but he couldn’t. Because somehow, he was dating Smackle and pining for Riley at the same time and he felt like the worst person and everything was a mess.</p><p>But it was okay, because their relationship was a flop. It barely lasted three months and the breakup was mutual if awkward and painful and Riley came to <em>him</em> because she "can't face Maya yet” and he held her and showed her the telescope and promised that nothing he’s ever seen in it compares to her.</p><p>She had blushed and pressed her lips to his cheek.</p><p>That’s when it became her fault.</p><p>But he didn’t resent her for it. How could he? How could anyone not love this girl?</p><p>His high school years had been wonderful. He had managed to remain close friends with both Smackle and Lucas. Maya had become one of his favourite people in the world as she coaxed him through his parent’s messy divorce. <em>That</em> ended up being the best thing for his individual relationships with both of his parents. He had flourished both academically and socially.</p><p>And Riley….</p><p>Riley had been hanging out with him over Maya. She’d been waiting at his locker and saving him seats and one night she danced with him on his rooftop beside the telescope to some stupid Taylor Swift song playing in one of the apartments across the street. She’d kissed him on the cheek 4 times and one time, she’d pulled back and cocked her head at him and Farkle dared to hope that maybe she was seeing him in a different light.</p><p>So, he’d screwed up his courage and planned a moonlit picnic on the roof for their annual Friday night get together. He’d written 12 speeches before finally deciding to speak from the heart, thinking Riley might appreciate that more. He’d worn the shirt that Riley liked best on him and bought a bouquet of sunflowers.</p><p>She didn’t come.</p><p>He’d had to hear from Maya that night as she climbed in through his window, tipsy and angry, that Riley was dating Lucas again- “for real this time”.</p><p>He thinks he might have been okay if he didn’t know Riley so well.</p><p>But he does. So, he’d recognized the look flitting in her eyes the next day at school when he finally caught her avoiding gaze. It was guilt.</p><p>She <em>knew</em>.</p><p>Riley had just been using him… he was no more than a Lucas placeholder for her.</p><p><em>That’s</em> when he resented her.</p><p>But he didn’t stop loving her. How could he? How could anyone not love this girl?</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Lucas can’t help but think that it’s Riley’s fault.</p><p>She’s not as ditzy as people think and she’s definitely noticed the thick awkwardness and just general discomfort surrounding the 4 of them lately.</p><p>He doesn’t know what happened with Farkle, but the genius kid barely speaks 3 consecutive words to anyone other than Maya anymore. Maya is… a mess… but what else is new? Even with Riley- his <em>girlfriend</em>- things have been feeling strained and uncomfortable lately: a result, no doubt, of the tensions between every respective person.</p><p>So, when she insists that he invite everyone home to Texas for the weekend after graduation, he knows it wasn’t with any misconceptions. Riley’s not as ditzy as people think. She <em>knew</em>.</p><p>But she’s Riley, so she won’t settle for anything less than lifelong, joyous, <em>perfect</em> friendships between everyone.</p><p>She’s still too much for him sometimes.</p><p>He’d argued with her for over half an hour- wait no, he misspoke- not <em>argued, </em>never <em>argued</em>. They had had an intense disagreement that had lasted for over half an hour.</p><p>He had lost. (Riley prefers to think of it as he had been persuaded to see things her way… He sees it as a defeat.)</p><p>And not just a defeat- a crushing one. Because he doesn’t want to do this. He <em>really </em>doesn’t want to do this. He honestly doesn’t know if he can. He was raised to be a gentleman, but there is just <em>so much </em>unspoken and gritty and messy crap between them all and <em>he </em>had been perfectly content to drift apart after high school and <em>MAYBE </em>go for lunch on occasional birthdays or see each other at high school reunions or something.</p><p>But she’s Riley, so she won’t settle for that.</p><p>He all but begs his Mom to forbid him from going to Texas alone with two girls in tow no less. But his Mom thinks it’s a great idea- had cooked up the scheme with Riley herself. He should have known.</p><p>After that, he can only pray that Farkle and/or Maya are unavailable, but he underestimated the power of Riley’s pleading and puppy dog eyes. (Not even the Lord stood a chance against those.)</p><p>So he finds himself sandwiched between Maya and Riley in the back seat of Farkle’s new car because Farkle needed a place for his snacks and new, improved GPS system. (Lucas could make this drive with his eyes shut, but nobody listened to him, because… what else is new?)</p><p>He thinks there’s probably something poetic about it, but it’s hard to focus on that when Riley has swung her legs into his lap and Maya has accidentally fallen asleep on his shoulder.</p><p>It’s gonna be a long weekend….</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Riley knows that it’s her fault.</p><p>She should have known that this was a bad idea. She <em>did</em> know that this was a bad idea.</p><p>But Farkle had wanted to try to ride a horse and Maya had wanted to laugh at him when he inevitably failed at riding a horse and tease Lucas when he did not and Lucas had wanted to laugh at Maya when she found out that it was much harder than it looked (and that in itself should have been an indicator) and Riley just wanted to see her friends happy again.</p><p>And then Farkle had hit it off with the riding instructor and it had upset Riley so much. She hadn’t wanted to analyze that though, because she still bites back guilt when she thinks of dancing with Farkle on the rooftop.</p><p>And <em>then </em>Maya had gotten thrown off the horse and Lucas had vaulted the fence to get to her and Riley had never seen him move so fast- his concern outweighed her own for God’s sake- and he had cradled Maya in his arms, brushing back her hair and crooning ‘Shortstack’… before he had remembered himself and had straightened, pasting on a now obviously fake, dutiful smile as he came back faithfully to Riley’s side and Maya had <em>crumpled </em>for an instant before chiding Farkle (who was spouting off symptoms like a medical dictionary to the fond pangs of Riley’s heart) and everything had finally clicked.</p><p>She <em>knew.</em></p><p>So obviously she had to fix it.</p><p>(She’s grown up a lot… but maybe some things just never change.)</p><p>They’re out back for a fire and if you squint, it’s 3 years ago. Only it’s so much better, because Riley gets it now. And she knows what she has to do. And maybe it’ll just make a mess again. But maybe that’s part of growing up and maybe that’s okay and maybe none of it matters because they’re all here and maybe just <em>maybe </em>they were meant to be right here all along.</p><p>Nobody else has gotten the memo though.</p><p>It’s so quiet around the campfire. Stiflingly, painfully, awkwardly so.</p><p>Riley breaks it though because of course she does.</p><p>“I’m so tired of not wanting two of my favourite people to spend time together.”</p><p>Lucas snorts into his iced tea and then promptly begins choking to death. Maya begins to laugh too loudly, bordering on hysterically. And Farkle vaults over Riley’s bowed head (since when is Farkle that fit?) to give Lucas a less than welcome Heimlich maneuver.</p><p>“Get off!” Lucas chokes out, shoving Farkle away with a wince.</p><p>Farkle obeys, stepping back and peering at Maya across the campfire, no doubt contemplating whether he should attempt some sort of psychological analysis on Riley’s still cackling friend.</p><p>Lucas gets himself under control and whirls around to point at Farkle accusingly. “I was choking on ICED TEA!! How would the Heimlich maneuver help in that situation?!”</p><p>Farkle, oddly enough, is silent. He seems neither remorseful nor vindicated. He’s just silent. And, at a frankly withering gaze from Lucas, Maya is too.</p><p>It's quiet again. Lucas is glaring at Farkle while studiously avoiding looking at Maya. Farkle is glaring back at Lucas defensively while studiously avoiding looking at Riley. And Maya is chugging her iced tea and studiously avoiding looking at anyone. You can literally hear crickets over the thick silence surrounding them.</p><p>Riley breaks it though because of course she does.</p><p>“I REALLY think that we should talk about it.”</p><p>Still, nobody says anything.</p><p>“Nothing? Really? Guys!! We <em>need </em>to talk!”</p><p>“<em>You</em> talk,” Maya spits sourly.</p><p>Lucas and Farkle don’t break their gazes but Lucas shrugs and Farkle rolls his eyes.</p><p>“Fine. I will. Lucas: I love you. I will always love you.” She paused to take a deep breath. “I don’t want to be your girlfriend. I deserve better and you deserve better and <em>Maya </em>deserves better. A better girlfriend would just leave, but I’m a fixer and I’m tired of us all pretending that you don’t look at Maya like she makes your stupid Huckleberry world turn.”</p><p>“Wha-”, Lucas started as Maya gasped.</p><p>Riley held up a hand though. “You all wanted me to talk, so hush. Maya: I love you too, Peaches. So so very much. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to make you realize how dear you are to me. I have ignored your feelings many times, hoping desperately that they would go away. But they haven’t. And really, it shouldn’t surprise me that you’ve figured out this world before me- you usually do. So, I’m sorry- I’m very, very sorry, Peaches. I’m done ignoring them and I’m done pretending that I don’t see the way you look at Lucas like you- you, Maya Penelope Hart! - would hop on a horse and ride into the sunset as long as he was with you.”</p><p>Nobody says anything this time.</p><p>“And… Farkle….” Riley’s courage trails away with her words. “I… I don’t know what to say to you, Farkle. I could say that I love you too, but I don’t know if you would believe me. And,” she holds up a hand again at Farkle’s protest, “I don’t even know if I would blame you.”</p><p>Farkle doesn’t say anything but he turns his gaze on her and she lets herself feel a tiny flicker of hope.</p><p>“Or I could tell you that I’m sorry but I don’t know if those two words could ever possibly convey how I feel. Because I feel <em>sick </em>at the way that I treated you. I feel sick and mean and unworthy of even your friendship.” Riley can see Maya and Lucas exchange confused glances before they whip their heads away from each other, blushing, but she ignores them.</p><p>She does what she should have done a long time ago: she focuses on Farkle Minkus.</p><p>“But I feel even more sick at losing you. So, I’m trying so hard to… I don’t even know, I-,” she breaks off, lost for words and lost for courage as Farkle’s indifferent and guarded expression never wavers. “I…,” she looks away in desperation, wondering why all campfires were such an awful experience for her.</p><p>And then it hit her.</p><p>“Farkle, would you like to go and get an ice cream? Because I would love to get an ice cream with you. For no other reason than that I like spending time with you more than anyone else I know… and… I miss you. I miss your smile and your constancy and your obscure space facts and your obsession with proper punctuation and your kindness and your-” Riley breaks off in a sob.</p><p>At the sound, Farkle’s stoicism cracks just a bit.</p><p>“Please,” Riley takes in a shuddering breath, “promise me that I haven’t lost that.”</p><p>It’s quiet again. Riley is attempting to get herself under control. Maya and Lucas are attempting to sneak glances at each other with nobody noticing. And Farkle… Farkle is clearly fiercely debating something internally.</p><p>Quite suddenly, he seems to come to a decision.</p><p>“You could never lose that, Riles.” He stands up and offers her a hand. “I would love to get an ice cream.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Maya maintains that it’s Riley’s fault. If Riley didn’t have the face of an infant, puppy, and Mother fricken Teresa rolled into one and the busybody-ness of Mrs. Rachel Lynde, Mrs. Norris, and Polonius rolled into one (Howdy made her read the assigned summer reading, okay?), then Maya wouldn’t be trailing behind a Huckleberry in the middle of literally nowhere at the CRACK OF STUPID with her feet rebelling at each step and her hair attempting to escape its carefully crafted bun and her teeth gritted together hard enough to give her headache with each new pontification from Bucky McBoingboing about “adventures” and “seizing the day” and “having a pleasant attitude please, Maya”.</p><p>Maya maintains that it’s Riley’s fault. When her faithful Ranger Rick drops back to hoist her onto his shoulders though, and promises they can get food after their hike, she finds that she doesn’t mind that much.</p><p> </p><p>Farkle has concluded that it’s Riley’s fault. How did he ever have a problem with Riley and Lucas?? They were so well behaved!</p><p><em>Maya </em>and Lucas, on the other hand, were miles behind <em>again, </em>and Maya had somehow coerced Lucas into giving her a piggy back and now she was whacking him on the head and telling him to “CHARGE” in a terribly obnoxious voice, no doubt scaring away all the wildlife Farkle had wanted to see.</p><p>So yes, it’s all Riley’s fault! Look at her standing there all innocent, lit up from behind by the rising sun, with her hair gently blowing in the breeze and her eyes alight with laughter- almost as beautiful as her smile….</p><p>Farkle has concluded that it’s Riley’s fault. He’s never been happier about that fact.</p><p> </p><p>Lucas can’t help but think that it’s Riley’s fault. If she wasn’t so insistent on life-long, perfect relationships between the four of them, he imagines he wouldn’t be being beaten and ordered about like a pack animal.</p><p>Maya had worn ridiculous shoes, because of course she had, and the impractical heels were digging into his sides while her hair was choking him every couple of steps. She was also <em>way </em>heavier than she looked.</p><p>When Farkle calls out that there's a lake up ahead, Maya slides off his shoulders and dashes ahead so fast that it actually takes him a moment to realize that he can stand up fully. When he does, his back twinges painfully, and he bites back a grimace.</p><p>She comes skipping along the path back to him. “Come <em>on, </em>Huckleberry!! I’ll give you a back massage later!”</p><p>Lucas can’t help but think that it’s Riley’s fault.</p><p>“My noble steed.” Maya leans up and catches his lips in a brief kiss, before entwining her fingers with his and tugging him along after her.</p><p>He supposes that Riley can be forgiven this time.</p><p> </p><p>Riley knows that it’s her fault. She’s finally okay with that.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I know this isn't how it actually works. (I'm rewatching Victorious right now and I forgot how annoying and unrealistic it was that Tori kept "fixing" Beck and Jade.) I didn't mean to insinuate that Riley fixed everything between Maya and Lucas or herself and Farkle. They obviously all had to have some painful and awkward conversations, all Riley did was open up the door for honest communication. (And I wanted to highlight that I think that this part of her personality can be a real strength too- I really do have a lot of feelings about Riley Matthews guys.) Having said that, be very careful before y'all meddle in other people's lives and feelings- it can be dangerous. Part of growing up for Riley is learning that, and learning to embrace her personality and learning how to demonstrate it better. *deep breath* I  couldn't fit all that in the actual fic for obvious reasons, so I hope it is clear and nobody is offended.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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